Upon investigation (driving with the radio off and the windows down, head hanging out, listening trying to establish where the noise was coming from - followed by my husband having a proper look) it became apparent that it needed the two rear brakes renewed NOW. 'Oh great,' I thought rather sarcastically.
Thankfully we have a great mechanic who is really reasonable, so we called him up. He was very apologetic that he couldn't fix it, but it turns out the pain he was getting pre-Christmas was a broken back! So he's at home receiving treatment and resting so it can heal for the next few months. He recommended someone else and they are fixing it tomorrow.
On the up side they were able to fit it in quickly, as it was not great to drive, noisy and potentially unsafe. On the down side any meagre savings I thought I might have made to keep us going into February will be well and truly swallowed up, as well as food budgets etc, as it's costing between £100-200 approximately!
My younger son also started complaining that he had grown out of his £38 school shoes (they last all year normally, unlike cheaper brands which wear through in a month) bought just in September, and needed a new pair. 'Oh great' I thought again, as I really do not have £38. I have no credit cards, no overdraft and am not able to borrow any money because of past debt issues (and to be fair, I don't want to). I thought I'd have a rummage about and see if we had any suitable next size up shoes for him left over from my older son to make do until we could afford a new pair. That's when I discovered what the problem was. I looked at my son's so called 'pair' of shoes: one was a size 2 and one was a size 3!! No wonder it hurt his feet as he's a size 3! Turns out he's swapped a shoe with another boy in his class who is younger than him. Hopefully tomorrow we can retrieve our shoe and release the wrong shoe back to it's owner. But I am relieved that I don't have to go shoe shopping just yet!
Looking at the 'pair' he's got, I can see why he might not have immediately noticed:
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| The one on the right of the picture is one UK size larger, hence the squeeze, but not easy to spot! |
But overall, I am being tested. We were so blessed to be able to shop for Christmas (albeit rather late into December due to lack of funds) and meet all our bills, but this thorough stretching of faith, finances, time and patience is just soooo very frustrating. The Bible talks about our 'flesh' - it's the part of us that so often craves comfort and satisfaction. Well at the moment my 'flesh' is screaming: 'Go shopping!', 'Eat out!', 'Book a holiday!'. In other words 'SATISFY ME! GIVE ME COMFORT!!!'
Obviously eating out, booking a holiday and going shopping are all things that would be a bit of a stretch anyway, but I can usually scrounge up enough money to be able to do something as a little (and I mean cheap) treat. But at the moment I am having to be 100% disciplined. NO treats at all. And my flesh is hating it.
The Bible says: "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." (Hebrews 12:11). So I guess I should be looking forward to the future harvest, and not concentrating on the pain of the discipline. Honestly, I am sure God will bring good from this. The Bible promises that he works all things to our benefit (Romans 8: 28). I am just being a grump : )
I have also been challenged however, as God has reminded me of Paul's words in Philippians 4: 11(b)-13:
"11bI have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13I can do all this through Him who gives me strength."
I guess God is reminding me that all I need is Him. After all, let's be honest, I am blessed with so much already, but He should be my everything.
So, I will do my best to put grumpiness away and ignore the cries of my flesh (who, let's be honest, only ever wants to draw me away from God and His will and great plans for my life and make me more miserable anyway). I will draw on God's strength, so that I can be content even when going through a discipline or in want and start trying to be a little bit more thankful for all my blessings : )
To end on a cheery note, my son, who had lost his shoe, was also being disciplined earlier after repeatedly not doing something we had asked him to do, because doing what he wanted was apparently more important. So, to press the lesson home we took away his computer tablet for a little while. He loves that tablet and taking away his comfort made him feel miserable (I know how he feels!).
In his tears and misery he wailed at my husband: "Do you like punishing people?!"
I heard from the lounge and had to stop laughing before he came to see me, to tell me all about how much Daddy likes punishing people ; ) Then at bedtime, Daddy, when saying a prayer and goodnight to our son, very gently said 'No, I don't like punishing people'. He was told very firmly: 'Well don't do it then!'
Children, they may be time, money and patience vampires (i.e. they suck you dry), but they don't half make you laugh! We've also had to leave a note to to remind our son to bring home a chart he made at school, that he was supposed to bring home, but forgot. What was it for?, we asked. It was for helping me to remember things, he replied. Ah, the irony!
And cheery note part two, here's some pictures of the beautiful amaryllis bulbs we were given for Christmas. The pink one is twice the height of the red one, but both are simply gorgeous. Enjoy : )
Isn't God clever? Be blessed : )
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