Title Deeds

Yesterday I had the dubious pleasure of cancelling yet another looked forward to social event/ trip out due to ill health. It doesn't get any easier to do and each time is a bit hope crushing, sad and disappointing.

I had always been a bit 'sickly', so decided to really press in for good health. As well as taking care of myself, I went to a great prayer night and got prayer with Randy Clark (yes, that Randy Clark). I woke the next day to a growl in my bedroom. I should've known then it was going to be an interesting journey.

I've been unwell since then with an illness which started acutely and has become chronic. Although I can see a steady uphill trend towards full health and have had several leaps forward as God has dealt with issues, it still seems to rule my life at times. After this long it does get me down from time to time and I really have to work on 'encouraging myself in the Lord', as it says David did in the Bible. On top of that I'd also had some sort of virus and other health issues grumbling away over the past couple of weeks. But I'd been waiting to go to see a butterfly house (an indoor place you can see butterflies) for years, so in faith we'd booked to go yesterday.

Tuesday night I was determined to get a good night's sleep so that I felt well enough to enjoy the day trip, so didn't even read before lights out and went to bed at a reasonable time. I lay in bed waiting for sleep to arrive. It didn't. So I prayed and praised and soaked in God's presence.

It was during this time that God gave me a really clear vision. I was in a courtroom, in a legal row with my opponent the devil, over some land. He claimed the land was his; he was dwelling on the land as we spoke and had been for some time. It looked like all was lost. Then I realised, that in my inside jacket pocket I had the Title Deeds to the land. It proved my ownership and legal right to it and showed him for the squatter that he was. I knew the judge would rule in my favour and it was only a matter of time.

God showed me that all the issues I face, whether small or large, whether long term ill health, massive debts or fixing a mower, God has given me the Title Deeds to His provision, His help, His rescue, His favour and complete deliverance - to effectively getting the land back - through His Word and through the gift of faith (see Hebrews 11: 1 in The Amplified Bible). As in legal battles, some are dealt with swiftly, some drag on for years, some are resolved with amazing 'suddenlies', some have to be enforced and enforced and enforced. But, through Jesus I have the Title Deeds and will know freedom in every area. I just have to trust God, stand on His Word and wait.

It was an amazing picture and I'm very grateful. But it didn't help me sleep. God promises sleep to those He loves (Psalm 127: 2), but I didn't get it that night. I've had rare times that I've chosen to stay up all night and nights that I've struggled to get off, but never a night that I didn't sleep at all. I kept a good attitude, I prayed, I stayed still. But at 6:15 a.m., aware our day out wasn't going to happen as I felt too rough, I got up.

I'm not perfect. I managed a couple of hours sleep during the morning after a bit of a rant in prayer and some tears. We managed to take the younger two of our children out in the afternoon to a park that they enjoyed. And I got a reasonable night of sleep last night (after a good hour or two of just laying there), despite feeling a little afraid that I wouldn't. And we're going to try our planned day out to see the butterflies again on Monday (I will report back as to whether we made it or not!).

I am now acutely aware that when you press in for the land given to you, the devil fights back and doesn't always play fair, and it often takes time to see your prayers answered. However I hope that in the days and years ahead it will be the vision of having the Title Deeds, not one of the most difficult and miserable nights of my life and another cancelled trip and the disappointment, that I'll remember.

May God bless you and grant you success as you press in with your Title Deeds, and patience as you wait to see His blessings in your life : )