For Such A Time As This ..... Part 2

As we entered January I felt slightly rested from the extreme exhaustion I'd entered the Christmas holidays with. It is just a well, as things ramped up very quickly!

The secured loan specialist was in touch the second week of January. At first he was very doubtful he could help. He seemed to go back on all the messages he'd sent via our financial adviser. It seems he didn't know we had four children, and told us if we didn't have the children to support he'd be able to get us the help we needed. It was a low point, but I had to keep trusting, after all my children were a gift from God!

Then he told us that if we were to borrow, we had to not only borrow what we needed for the house, equipment and vehicles, but we also had to pay off our Debt Management Plan (DMP)! We are talking a colossal sum of money here. Again, it was hard.

I knew it was possible to speak to creditors to negotiate a settlement at less than the full amount. I spoke to the company managing our DMP. They said as we didn't have funds available within 14 days they could not help. I asked for telephone numbers for the creditors so I could negotiate. They refused. They said I should Google them. I was cross at how very unhelpful they were, but I did Google. And I found numbers for all 14 creditors. And I started to call.

Negotiating with one person to whom you owe money is hard. You have to bear your soul, explain why you got into the trouble you did. You have to re-live traumatic events that led to you getting into debt - times you never want to think of again. Now imagine doing that 14 times over. There were more than a few tears and I felt as if I were climbing a mountain. Somehow God gave me the courage to persevere.

Some were helpful and kind. Many were not. Some were downright obstructive.

Over the period of a week we managed to negotiate settlements with all 14 creditors. Then the loan broker said we needed letters as proof. So we had to call them all again. Each settlement had an expiry date, which during the course of the loan we had to extend again and again as things dragged on.

Then the broker wanted up to date accounts for home and business. And he wanted it approved and signed for by an accountant. We were ten months behind in our accounts and I am the accountant, but I wouldn't do. Within a week of working constantly, morning, noon and night, I got the accounts up to date and did a clear spreadsheet for our accountant friend to look over and sign.

Every time I spoke to the broker and thought I'd done enough, there was more. What little rest I'd gained over Christmas I spent a hundred times over, working all day every day, and all weekend. I have run on adrenaline and hardly seen the children. And my health has deteriorated as a result.

There have been low points - the broker was not an easy man to deal with, neither was the loan company or the company managing our DMP. Keeping 14 creditors, the broker, the loan company and the DMP all happy and in harmony has been a juggling act. But God had given me the exact skill set necessary to do it - 'for such a time as this'.

There have also been encouragements along the way. One day when gardening at work I heard the cry of a bird of prey above me - and there were my birds circling on the thermals again. 'Look up,' they seemed to cry. 'Let Him do the heavy lifting.' (I'm still practising that whole trust thing - I guess it comes from being let down a lot. I'm certain He understands.) Another day I became aware that I was starting to look to the future with hope. Sometimes you don't realise when something is missing until it appears again. I hadn't felt proper hope, hope for the future, in a long time.

Finally, just over a week ago, the loan came through. Then last week, finally, the DMP was paid off. Overall it has been a three month, hard, uphill journey.

The loan is at a higher than normal interest rate as we have a poor credit history, and therefore we have very large repayments to make each month. But the hope/ plan is that in the middle of next year we should be able to remortgage again to get everything onto a better rate, as our credit file should be mostly repaired and our income should be up.

We need to work hard to repay the loan, and also as our income needs to rise so we can get a large enough remortgage. It is the last thing I feel like doing as I am shattered. My health has been suffering since I have stopped - the adrenaline took a while to wear off, then I found it hard to move off the sofa. I've had almost constant migraines, digestive disorders, hormone imbalances and felt very ill at times. But I believe as I keep trusting God, so He WILL renew my strength.

Some may question about getting a loan to pay a debt. I did too. On the whole, after all I've experienced, I believe debt is an awful thing to be avoided. But I believe God has said that He was using a world system to our advantage, to get us out of the ditch we were in. We'd just had an interesting sermon on how God often uses something from the world to save His people in great times of need, such as Cyrus saving the Israelites (see 'Cyrus the Great in The Bible' on Wikipedia). But that's a story for another day. Needless to say if I didn't believe it was Him, I wouldn't have done it.

Ultimately, what God has done, is show us a way where we can borrow funds to stay living here in our home, replace our ageing cars, do up our house and repay our debts, and yet owe less than we did to begin with! It is a miracle, and as with so many miracles it wasn't the supernatural taking the problem from us, but working with us to bring us through it.

I feel as David did in 2 Samuel 7: 18 - 19:

"Then David the king went in and sat before the LORD, and he said, "Who am I, O Lord GOD, and what is my house, that You have brought me this far? "And yet this was insignificant in Your eyes, O Lord GOD, for You have spoken also of the house of Your servant concerning the ... future."

God has promises He's spoken to me about my future and that of my family, my household. There are promises He would speak to you, and has already spoken to you.

God says:

"Whenever I cover the sky with clouds and the rainbow appears, I will remember my promise to you .." Genesis 9: 14

Though times may be tough, though health may flounder or fail, though we know know lack, though promises or hopes may be dead ... yet God. He is the God with the power of the resurrection. He is resurrecting my dead finances, and my hopes ... and I believe my health, dreams and promises.

As He said to me late last year: "I may not always rescue you from it. But I will be with you in it. And I will bring you through it."

So I apologise for my absence, I have been having to work so hard, and been so unwell. But God ...

May you not only be blessed, but know miracles and resurrection in your life too. : )

For Such A Time As This ... Part 1

In my last post I said that I would write more later that week. I cannot believe that I last posted a month ago! Where does the time go? These days it simply seems to fly ... or drag, depending on circumstances : )

I wrote about a wonderful service we had at the end of November, when God spoke to me through the preacher, saying that like Esther, I was here for such a time as this. Those words have proved to be so true.

Many years ago, through a variety of circumstances, my husband and I got into debt. It was a gradual process, and we prayed all the way through begging God for a solution. We were scared of losing our home so we didn't seek help until we were very deep in debt. We spoke to family members and I was ridiculed and told it was all my fault - a deeply damaging experience. We ran out of food and money. Several Christmas times in a row we had real crunch points, where it was gifts for the children or food. The stress was beyond anything I've ever known.

I believe the stress contributed greatly to the ill health I have been suffering from for the last four years.

Five years ago we did finally seek help from a free advice service and we entered what's called a Debt Management Plan. All our creditors agreed to receive an affordable fixed amount from us each month and in turn we could live again. However, at the rate we could afford to pay it was going to take 30 years to pay off the debts. And our cars were getting older and more decrepit. We needed some work equipment. And parts of our house needed desperate attention. And the Debt Management Plan took all we had 'spare'. Yet again we needed a miracle.

Enter the word 'for such a time as this'. God has not just given me the ability to hear from Him, but also finance and administration skills. I felt the Lord say to speak to our bank for a small loan for a work van. I went to the bank and the bank showed me our credit score (how company's work our whether it is safe to loan you money). It was the worst possible score and they refused a loan. I left the bank a bit despondent. I had worked very hard on our business accounts, our home accounts, our business plan, our cash flow, all showing how we could afford a loan. It had taken me a very long time.

My husband said 'Don't worry, it won't all be for nothing'. We were stood outside at the time. I looked up and we saw birds of prey above our heads, circling on the thermals. First there was two, then four. They soared and swooped, then soared again. They were beautiful and majestic. I felt God was reminding us that:

"But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." Isaiah 40: 31 NLT

Then God nudged me to speak to our financial adviser. I explained our position (which was humbling, as I had to admit our huge debts once again). But I pointed out we had a lot of money in our property. Could we borrow against the property, rather than an unsecured loan? I felt that was how God was leading. That was December 8th 2014.

Because Christmas was coming everything was slow. It took several weeks for him to speak with our existing mortgage company to see if they were prepared to loan us more. So he handed us over to a secured loan specialist he knew. He said it should be a reasonably easy process as we had covered so much groundwork already. He was wrong.

We entered Christmas weary from work and the extra pressure the financial side of things had put on us. We had little money, and no promise of a good outcome. I felt spent and the devil attacked my mind constantly with negative thoughts. All we could do was praise, hope and trust ....

Part 2 shortly.   Be blessed : )